A Solitary Solstice
by KimicThranduilion
Summary: Thranduil unwittingly finds himself alone for Yuletide for the first time in many centuries. He reflects and remembers.


**A/N: So I've wrote two one-shots based off winter/Christmas prompts found online to celebrate this Christmas 2018. This is the first offering – the second will be posted up tomorrow. Enjoy!**

 **Prompt:** Someone doesn't have anyone to spend Christmas with

 **Rating:** G

 **Setting:** Mirkwood palace T.A. 3018. Legolas has left to attend the Council of Elrond but word has not yet reached Thranduil that his son has volunteered for the Fellowship

 **Characters:** Thranduil

 **Summary:** Thranduil unwittingly finds himself alone for Yuletide for the first time in many centuries. He reflects and remembers.

Thranduil stared at the food that had been brought up for him. It was quite the large spread and the Elven King wondered at it. There was a whole roasted pheasant, creamy mashed potatoes, tender steamed greens, fresh bread rolls and butter, rich gravy and honey glazed carrots and parsnips. There was also a winter berry trifle and a honey and apple tart with a pot of custard alongside. It all smelled and looked wonderful, quite tasty – in fact Thranduil was certain it would be so – his cooks are the best on Arda after all. Yet what the blonde could not get his head around was the quantities of the food in question.

There was so much. Enough to feed a family; and Thranduil could not decide whether his cooks have been forgetful of his current circumstances or whether they expected him to be holding some sort of a miniature feast.

Perhaps they assumed he was hosting guests – not an unreasonable assumption. He oft did – there was usually some combination of his Regent Lord Arahaelon, Crown Commander Aglardaer, his Elite, Legolas and his nanny turned mentor Thanniel along with all their own respective guests. Merry indeed has been the King's table in Yuletides gone past.

Yet this year was different; different even to the previous year when it was simply him, Legolas and Thanniel who had sat down for the Yuletide meal. For this year he was alone.

He did not deliberately intend this – for who yearned to be alone at Yule?

Yet it had been a hard year – one full of setbacks and losses and bloodshed and blow after blow from the Enemy who threatened to push them ever further North. His _eledhrim_ were all feeling the pressure and strain of the near constant fighting they were all engaged in and as the end of the year and it's cherished holidays loomed near Thranduil had made sure to give all his nearest and dearest as much time off as possible to spend with their loved ones. Despite the many protests Arahaelon, Aglardaer and his Elite – Duron, Arthon and Arodon – had made, Thranduil had sent them rather firmly home to spend time with their families and friends. Time spent with loved ones was exceptionally precious these days in the face of the violence and rage of the Enemy.

They had all acquiesced in the end and Thranduil had thought nothing more of it at the time. He, Legolas and Thanniel would enjoy themselves together once more.

Alas, the combination of the debacle with that Gollum creature alongside Elrond having summoned a council had seen Legolas off to Rivendell and as yet there had been no news from his son save to say that he had arrived safe and well but did not know when his return was likely to be. Thranduil rather suspected he'd not see his son until the spring now and the thought did not bother him overmuch; he would far rather have Legolas safe in Rivendell than have him trying to traverse the treacherous Misty Mountains in deepest winter.

As for Thanniel she had accepted an invite to spend the _Ennyn Rhîw_ and Yuletide holidays with Legolas' aunt – his deceased wife's sister – in the Golden Wood and had accepted Legolas' offer of escort on his way to Rivendell.

And so Thranduil found himself very much alone on Yule.

He hadn't thought anything of it at the time of finding out about his impending loneliness, yet now as he stared at the food piled high before him he wasn't so sure. The quantities silently mocked his lonesomeness with their vastness. The kitchen staff must have forgotten or perhaps he himself had failed to notify them that he would not be hosting his usual group this year – after all he'd been caught in so many meetings with the war council and the defence council as they plotted their efforts to keep the Woodland Realm free from the grasp of the Evil One. It would've been an easy oversight to make.

Thranduil sighed as he picked up one of the warmed plates and began to serve himself a moderate meal from the abundance before him. He willed his mind to stay away from the memories of Yuletide feasts past yet the memories came unbidden regardless.

Memories of sitting round the table in the old palace at Amon Lanc with his _Adar, Naneth_ and newly crowned _Hervess_. The last precious Yuletide where his beloved Celeblassel was still alive and a young elfling Legolas had finally been old enough to take interest in and enjoy the holiday much to the pleasure of his _Naneth_ and older sister Rithel. Memory of the last Yule he'd spent with his daughter alive, hale, healthy, newly married and blushing across the table at her nervy husband. Even last year's Yule meal had been fantastic despite it being just him, Thanniel and Legolas – the three of them had been the epitome of eating, drinking and being merry. They'd had great fun laughing long into the night.

Thranduil looked at the plate he was picking at now – it was as though he ate ashes for all the joy it brought him. Food was best served with others and laughter.

Still, Thranduil forced down another forkful; there was no sense in the hard work of the cooks going to waste simply because he was feeling forlorn. He would simply send word down to the kitchens to stock the private kitchen in the royal wing and not to bother sending him up any more food. He'd make do for himself for the rest of the holidays.

The thought of the rest of the holidays spent alone loomed large in the Elven King's mind just then and he gave and involuntary shudder. He'd send up for wine as well. Plenty of it.

If he was going to have to spend the next week with nothing but his loneliness, the ringing silence of a palace all but abandoned for the holidays and his memories of better times then he would need Dorwinion and plenty of it.

Thranduil finished his sad meal and set his plate aside before dragging himself up and out onto his balcony and into the brisk winter air. His kingdom shone and sparkled with the beauty of snow and the artfully decorated trees and there was a quiet hum of contented elves enjoying time with loved ones and the break from the onslaught of the Enemy. Thranduil smiled as he took in the sights and sounds. It was freezing cold out on the balcony but he was an elf and after all it was a better chill than that of the loneliness that awaited him in his chambers.

He'd stay out and soak up the atmosphere for just a little while longer.

 **END.**

Eledhrim – Elves

Ennyn Rhîw – The Gates of Winter

Adar – Father

Naneth – Mother

Hervess – Wife

 **A/N:** **Just an FYI in my headcanon Ennyn Rhîw is the elvish equivalent of Thanksgiving with Yuletide being Christmas.**

 **Also I hope everyone finds someone they can spend even a little time with on Christmas Day even if you have to make do with a phone call or FaceTime. Be kind to yourself and each other**

 **KimicT**


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